Monday, February 12, 2007


We met with the RE today. I like Dr. F. I like Wendy the nurse a LOT.

I liked some of what they had to say and didn't like some of it, but I am not in control.

Not being in control of a situation is very hard for me. I'm the one with the plans. I'm the one who figures out the directions, makes sure things are packed, figures out what to do first and next. That's who I am. It's my place in my family. I feel comfortable being in control.

Not being in control is like being lost in a snowstorm. (I'm looking at the storm raging outside, it looks like I felt) Now that we have a plan, I feel more in control.

What IS the plan exactly? Well....

If I'm not pregnant this cycle, which I will know by Saturday, we'll start Clomid and do an IUI this month. We'll do IUI's for 3 months, after which if we are not successful, we'll talk about IVF. We are very lucky that our insurance will pay for a portion of IUI's and IVF's.

We are in the percentage of those couples with unknown IF. It appears that I do ovulate, but Dr. F feels that Clomid will cover that base, just in case. Mr's counts are good, but we are going to do another SA just to get the type of numbers that Dr. F wants. The other lab only used WHO terms and Dr. F wants critical motility counts. My progesterone looks fine, FSH was fine as was TSH. I have carried a child before. It's that damn unknown.

The plan, well, the plan I like. I like that we have a place to go, to move towards. It's a little overwhelming, but it's okay.

It's okay.

1 comment:

Adrienne said...

Losing that control is one of the worst things about IF (not THE worst thing, obviously, but bad enough, especially for us control-freaks).

I'm glad the Plan gave some of that back to you.