Tears

Yesterday, on the message board where I've made lots of friends...many whom I've met in real life, the latest of SIX new BFP's were announced.

I'll admit it. It stings. Some, but not all of them were "oops." Some were the first month trying. One though was from a loving woman who just had her first IUI.

I'm happy for all of them, but yes...jealous.


Today though, I have tears for a different reason.

Michelle from the Clinical trial called this morning to schedule our first appointment! She still doesn't have a firm answer on what has to be done before I turn 36 but we are proceeding anyway! The are currently producing the medium for freezing my eggs. I think she said it would be produced by July 24th.

We have an appointment for all the preliminary things on MONDAY AUGUST 6th at 9 am! DH will have to give a sample. I'll have a pap and exam. If all is going well with the medium, they will do all the blood work that day as well! This is good timing as AF should be just here or expected right about then.

I'm crying over this and I don't know why! I think it's because it seems more real now! We are actually doing it!

For a recap, this is a study where they will retrieve my eggs and freeze them unfertilized. As early as the next cycle, they will be thawed and ICSI will be used to fertlize them. They'll be transfered back to my uterus and we'll hope for the best.

Any that are fertilized and make it to refreezing can be used at a later time. If I am not PG the first try, we can use the frozen embryos for the following 6 months with no cost. (oh, the cost of the stims/egg retrieval/freezing/ICSI/all that? No charge!)

They will follow any resulting pregnancies and babies born from them for the first year.

So yes, tears...I'm a little scared and very excited.

**I'm also aware that there are still things that could prevent us from being fully accepted, but my fingers are SO crossed!**


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Update!
Michelle heard back from her supervisor,

"I have not heard anything to the contrary, as long as she meets qualifications UPON ENTRY of the study, she qualifies"

That means, as long as my consent is signed and blood work is done by my birthday (which should all be done on Aug 6th) I'm IN!

OMG...now I am really crying!!!!!